How often do we get the opportunity to hear our own “eulogy’ while still alive?

“Dad, this is going to sound a lot like a eulogy.”  These were the opening words of an eldest daughter at a family birthday party gathering to celebrate her father’s 80^th year. A gathering of daughters, sons, grandchildren, great grandchildren, a sister, in-laws, nieces, nephews and close friends who travelled from far and wide to be together under one roof to celebrate a major milestone in life.

In Silver Linings, Terry Lees shares a deeply touching and emotional occasion for he and his wife, as he explores family, the foundation of human identity, the cradle of life and love, an honour bestowed by God.

Listen to the episode below, or continue on to read the transcript.

Episode Transcript:

“Dad, this is going to sound a lot like a eulogy.”

These were the opening words of our eldest daughter at a family birthday party gathering to celebrate my 80^th year. What a gathering it was! Our daughters, sons, all our grandchildren, all but one of our great grandchildren, a sister, in-laws, nieces, nephews and close friends travelled from far and wide to be together under one roof to celebrate a major milestone in my life.

We are a close-knit, loving family, yet family gatherings such as this are now few and far between. Time and the tyranny of distance, with family members scattered across the country, conspire to lessen the frequency of such loving events. I guess they now fall into the rare category. And, truth be told, it may be several years before we are again reunited so fully as family.

It was a joy-filled, deeply touching and emotional occasion for my wife and me. It meant the world to us! To hear the musings of our loved ones and friends as they shared their recollections of highlights of my life was enlightening, revealing and, at times, had everyone in fits of laughter. It opened doorways to forgotten memories.

A young priest, who shared the celebrations with us, commented that he could feel the love in the room, and it was obvious to him the bonds of family were so evidently strong.

“Bear fruit – fruit that will last” [John 15:16]. Family is the foundation of human identity. Belonging is a vital component of human lives. Our marriage is blessed with offspring, in whom we instilled deep love and sense of family, of belonging. They, in turn, passed that gift of grace on to their children. Our hearts burst with love and pride when we witness the love and sense of family spirit so alive in our loved ones.

Family is a shared and treasured value. As parents, grandparents and great grandparents, we felt affirmed in the ways we raised our family and instilled this value in each of them What a blessing! The roles of patriarch and matriarch sit comfortably with us, as we savour the love and respect accorded us. It is an honour bestowed by God, the light of God shining on us and through us – it’s called grace.

I once read that a family is like many things, perhaps most like a garden. It needs time, attention, and cultivation. The sunshine of laughter and affirmation. It also needs the rains of difficulties, tense moments, and serious discussions about issues that matter. And there must be spadework, where hardness is broken loose, and planting of fresh seeds is accomplished with lots of TLC.

The Catechism of the Catholic Church says that the family is the “original cell of social life” and that it is “established by the Creator with its own nature, essential properties, and purpose” [# 2207]. For each individual the family is the cradle of life and love where they are born and grow.

One of the central teachings of Jesus is that we all share one heavenly father and are all brothers and sisters of Christ. The prayer that Jesus taught begins with the words “Our Father…” This one large family is the family of God. Our first and last belonging is that we belong to God – we come from God and go to God.

We are called by name to be part of this family, drawn together and constituted as a family by the Holy Spirit. No family is perfect, and there are always members of the family with different temperaments, but there is one fundamental bond: faith.

Every family confronts challenges, yet how we address them defines our bond. Trials can either break unity or strengthen it. Confronting challenges with faith, seeking God’s wisdom, and relying on God’s strength showcases resilience and tenacity to our children, demonstrating that our bond is unbreakable even in the storms of life.

I accept I am not perfect, as a parent, grandparent, or human being. Every day I commit my family to God – “As for me and my family, we will serve the LORD.” [Joshua 24:15]. Jesuit priest Patrick O’Sullivan wrote, “… our faith and prayer for others can enable Jesus to touch them because they are embraced within our world of faith…”

Every day I pray for my loved ones. As I pray, I know my loved ones are touched by Jesus with protective, overflowing love, that they are embraced, wrapped, enveloped within the beautiful gift of faith given to me by an ever-loving, ever-present God.

Did the musings of my loved one’s sound something like a eulogy?  I guess it did. However, how often does one get the opportunity to hear one’s own “eulogy’?

 

Look for the Silver Lining.

This is Terry Lees

[Music: Live Like You Were Dying – Tim McGraw]